Sunday 7 April 2013

Chapter 9 - The recovery begins again



This is what I was living with everyday I had to see this everyday. This was around 4 weeks after it had opened up. so it doesnt look to bad, but imagine watching your stomach becoming this. My stomach parted like the red sea. I should have been getting ready to go back to work, getting back to normal. Seeing this was my reality everyday for 3 months, then every other day for 6 weeks and then every 2 days for 3 weeks.

It disgusted me, repulsed me. As I said before after watching this unfold I needed oxygen. Things like this dont happen to me. This did and I had to live with this, looking at it, seeing it.

This resulted in me going to the district nurses everyday to have the wound cleaned, packed and dressed. This was everyday. My life was officially on hold. I wasnt able to do anything I was told to rest and take it easy.

How could I do this when my wife is 37 weeks pregnant she should be resting and taking it easy not me. I should be looking after her and helping her and I couldnt. My resentment towards my surgeon was unreal I wanted him dead. My anger took over me, an overwhelming feeling.

Anger would become a big part of my life over the next 12 months.

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